Each year, around this time, I begin my descent into a holiday funk – usually running from Thanksgiving through to my birthday in early February. It’s a combination of things that contribute…but being single with no children and an only child in a family that does not associate with the extended family very much is high on the list. It’s so easy to feel left out and alone when it seems like everyone around you has someone to share the holidays with and enjoy. Kind friends have tried to include me in their family events but I always end up feeling like I don’t quite belong.
This year, the descent began around Halloween, which is record early. So in an effort to try to ward the funk off, I am hereby boycotting my own usual efforts to fake holiday festiveness. I will not:
*Force myself to listen to holiday music, hoping that it will put me in the “holiday spirit”
*Watch holiday movies (for the same reason stated above)…though I don’t think I can boycott the annual showing of A Christmas Story…and Christmas Vacation does make me laugh
*Go to the mall until the swimsuits return to the racks (which, really, is January)
*Spend hours creating and sending cards most people probably throw away anyway
*Debate the merits of a Christmas tree, put one up and then immediately take it down, as I often do
*Hope that this year will be different, and something miraculous will happen that will make the holidays wonderful fun
I will still purchase gifts (online!!) for those I care for, though this year’s pocketbook is a little light. But I will do so in the spirit of reminding them that I love them, not because it’s the holidays and I feel like I have to…and remind myself that it is the thought that counts, not the cost or quantity.